How to Become a Foster Parent in Tennessee
In the summer of 2019, PJ and I said yes to something that would change our lives forever.
At the time, we had been married for four years, together for nine, and living in our little Craftsman house trying to figure out what building a family might look like for us. We had talked about adoption, we had talked about foster care, and we had even talked about surrogacy. However, our hearts kept coming back to foster care and we settled on that pretty early on. We had attended informational meetings and completed our training. But nothing truly prepares you for the phone call.
Our first placement was a sibling group of three, ages four, two-and-a-half, and eighteen months. We said yes before our home was barely even open.
Overnight, our quiet house became a home filled with diapers, car seats, bedtime routines, stuffed animals, doctor appointments, laundry mountains, and more love than we knew what to do with.
Those three children were our first placement. They were also our only placement.
After fostering them for two years, we officially adopted them in the summer of 2021.
People often ask if we always knew we would adopt them. The truth is that foster care doesn't begin with adoption as the goal. The primary goal of foster care is reunification whenever it can be done safely. Adoption becomes an option only when reunification is no longer possible. If we’re speaking candidly, though, the answer is yes; we knew from week one that we loved our children and wanted to be their parents for as long as they would have us.
But today, seven years after that life-changing phone call, we cannot imagine our lives any other way.
If you've ever wondered whether foster care might be right for your family, here's what you should know.
First, Some Foster Care Facts
As of 2024, approximately 329,000 children were living in foster care in the United States, and nearly 171,000 children entered foster care during the year. About 45% of children who exited foster care were reunified with their families, while 27% were adopted.
In Tennessee, thousands of children remain in foster care on any given day, and the state continues to recruit foster families willing to care for children of all ages, particularly sibling groups, teenagers, and children with special needs.
The need is real.
And despite what many people assume, foster parents come from all kinds of backgrounds.
You don't need to be wealthy. You don't need a giant house. You don't even need to be a perfect parent. You simply need a safe home, a willingness to learn, and a heart open enough to walk alongside a child during a difficult chapter of their life.
How to Become a Foster Parent in Tennessee
Step 1: Learn More About Foster Care
The first step is connecting with Tennessee's foster care system and attending an informational meeting. Tennessee partners with organizations that help prospective foster parents understand the process, ask questions, and determine whether fostering is the right fit for their family. We also reached out to friends who were foster parents and asked them every question we could think of.
This is where PJ and I started.
We had questions, and lots of them. How does placement work? What happens if a child returns home? How often do foster parents see biological families? Could we handle the emotional side of it? The informational meetings helped answer many of those questions and gave us a realistic picture of what fostering looks like.
Step 2: Complete Training
Tennessee requires prospective foster parents to complete pre-approval training called TN KEY (Knowledge Empowers You). The training covers topics like:
Trauma and childhood development
The child welfare system
Medical and educational needs
Behavior management
Building resilience
CPR and First Aid
The goal is to help prepare you for the unique challenges and opportunities that come with caring for children who have experienced loss and uncertainty.
Step 3: Complete a Home Study
A home study sounds intimidating, but it's really about ensuring that children are entering a safe environment.
The process typically includes:
Interviews with family members
Background checks
Home visits
Financial documentation
Health information
References
The home study begins during training and helps determine whether a family is approved for foster care.
Step 4: Meet Tennessee's Basic Requirements
According to the Tennessee Department of Children's Services, foster parents must:
Be at least 21 years old
Be a Tennessee resident
Pass criminal background checks
Have sufficient income to meet household needs
Complete required training
Provide a safe home environment
Applicants are eligible regardless of gender, race, color, or national origin.
Step 5: Wait for the Phone Call
This is the part nobody can truly prepare you for. One day your house looks exactly the same as it always has, and the next day there are tiny shoes by the front door and car seats in the backseat and children sitting at your kitchen table asking for snacks. For us, it happened in the summer of 2019. One phone call. Three kids. An entirely different life.
Why We Chose Foster Care
When people hear our story, they often assume we chose foster care because it was the quickest path to adoption. That wasn’t the case for us, and that wasn't our mindset. What drew us to foster care was the opportunity to help children who needed a safe place to land. We knew adoption might happen, but we also knew it might not.
Foster care asks you to hold two truths at once: You love children wholeheartedly, and you support whatever outcome is best for them. That's not always easy, at least it wasn’t for us. But it is truly one of the most meaningful things we've ever done.
What We Wish People Knew
People sometimes tell us they could never foster because they would get too attached, and we understand that feeling. We got attached too. The goal isn't to avoid loving children so it won't hurt. The goal is to love them anyway. That’s the entire point: to love them too much. To provide stability, comfort, routine, and belonging during a season when they need it most. For some families, that season lasts a few weeks. For others, a few months.
For us, it became forever.
Could Foster Care Be Right for You?
If you've ever felt curious about foster care, consider this your sign to learn more. Because somewhere in Tennessee today, there are children waiting for safe homes, caring adults, and someone willing to answer a phone call that could change everything.
It certainly changed ours.
Helpful Resources
For Tennessee-specific information on becoming a foster parent, training requirements, and the approval process, visit the Tennessee Department of Children's Services foster parent resources.